I had no girlfriend or love interest. I desired less and also masturbated less. I mentally classified most people that I met as either unattainable or suffering from a kind of sad, terminal inner artlessness. In my evaluation of people, there was no middle ground, only those two categories. I wasn’t being aggressively social because being social meant being underwhelmed.
~ how I failed at life in quebec city, a semi-long & semi-depressing personal essay by me on anorexia, anxiety, bleakness, claustrophobia, cities, videogames, lack of desire, crippling numbness, other things. (via monogamie)